timeless wisdom from the iconic high school slacker...

Since turning 50, I’ve been approaching my resolution to have more joy-inducing, non-productive, full fat fun, with a new mantra: What Would Ferris Do?

Ferris, as in Bueller, of “Day Off” fame.

Yes, Ferris, the quintessential high school slacker, is my midlife happiness guru.

Allow me to explain…

1. Ferris knew the key to happiness.

While still a senior in high school, Ferris grasped something that takes many of us a lifetime to learn. Research backs this up: for a joyful life, prioritize spending time with people you love, doing things you truly enjoy.

Ferris chooses his girlfriend, Sloane, and best friend, Cameron, to share his excellent adventure. Their day off is filled with unique experiences, from cheering on the Chicago Cubs to performing in a street parade, dining in the fanciest restaurant in Chicago, and driving a Ferrari. They do not go shopping and buy a bunch of stuff they don't need.

My ideal “day off” is not so different—except for the lying and car-stealing! I’m at my happiest when surrounded by my favorite friends or family members, in a relaxed setting, with a fun activity (ideally outdoors, depending on the season) plus plenty of time for chatting. And excellent food, of course.

When unique opportunities crop up in the middle of the week, or friends come to town and want to get together, I now ask myself WWFD? and prioritize fun instead of work and routine.

2. Ferris knew the power of a strategic day off.

Ferris wanted to graduate from high school and remain in his parents’ good graces; hence, he took one day off, not a week.

Finding the right balance between responsibilities to others and our well-being is tricky, especially in midlife, when we’re sandwiched between caring for aging parents and school-aged children, all while navigating busy careers.

One grown-up version of Ferris’s day off is an Artist Date, which author Julia Cameron describes in The Artist’s Way as “a once-weekly, festive, solo expedition to explore something that interests you. The Artist Date need not be overtly “artistic”– think mischief more than mastery.” Cameron recommends spending an hour or two on an Artist Date, making it an efficient, weekly version of a “day off.”

Some of my fondest memories are the “day-dates” my husband and I have taken to celebrate our wedding anniversary. Instead of the standard anniversary dinner at a restaurant, we’ve taken a weekday afternoon off work to enjoy a leisurely lunch, wander around a museum or park, do some shopping, and indulge in a decadent early dinner.

3. Ferris knew that fun requires planning.

Instead of lazing around in bed on his day off, Ferris orchestrated and planned a schedule brimming with intentional adventures. And while we don’t know when he came up with the idea, I’m willing to bet Ferris was gleefully anticipating his day off for some time.

Amid a busy life, if I don’t plan to get together with my favorite people, it doesn’t happen.

My strategy for ensuring we stay connected is through planning recurring activities in advance, from annual family trips to weekly or monthly lunch or coffee dates, regular exercise classes, and walks with friends. Not only is this a scheduling hack, but studies have suggested that we get more happiness from anticipating experiential purchases than material goods, so having a fun activity planned in advance boosts joy.

I’m currently gleefully anticipating a special two-night sleepover with friends to celebrate a birthday, and while we’re together, I plan to confirm a date for our next get-together to keep the good vibes going.

4. Ferris knew that life is short and not to be wasted.

In The Top 5 Regrets of the Dying, a bestselling memoir by a palliative care nurse, the author detailed the five common themes that emerged as dying people looked back on their lives, which included, “I wish I hadn’t worked so hard” and, poignantly, “I wish I had let myself be happier.”

As Oliver Burkeman succinctly states in Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals, “The average human lifespan is absurdly, terrifyingly, insultingly short.” As per the book's title, we each have around 4,000 weeks.

When I have a choice between fun vs. unnecessary shoulds, I’m reminding myself to ask WWFD? and prioritize the people, places, and activities that bring me joy, whether it’s for a few hours, an entire day, or a vacation.